Enjoy!

Man’s first Mistake

On the first day, God created the dog and said:

‘Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.’

The dog said: ‘That’s a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I’ll give you back the other ten?’

So God agreed.

**********

On the second day, God created the monkey and said:

‘Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I’ll give you a twenty-year life span.’

The monkey said: ‘Monkey tricks for twenty years? That’s a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?’

And God agreed.

**********

On the third day, God created the cow and said:

‘You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer’s family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years.’

The cow said: ‘That’s kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I’ll give back the other forty?’

And God agreed again.

**********

On the fourth day, God created man and said:

‘Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I’ll give you twenty years.’

But man said: ‘Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?’

‘Okay,’ said God, ‘You asked for it.’

So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I’m doing it as a public service.

This post is from Leanne Wildermuth : Artist by Nature.

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Me.

This post is from Leanne Wildermuth : Artist by Nature.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

This post is from Leanne Wildermuth : Artist by Nature.

Introducing … Bits n’ Blurbs!

I know I’m not a big blog. I don’t count up my inbound links or think Alexa (or whatever) has any bearing on the reason I blog or the awesome people I’ve met. I honestly don’t really care about all that. What I do care about is whether or not you all come back, because if you don’t – that means I’m a dork. Maybe a neglectful dork, and most likely a boring dork. In the spirit of knocking out the former, I give you a full on comprehensive payback of the wonderfulness that is you guys, those of you who find my blog dork-free. I thank you, from the bottom of my heart and the deepest darkest archives of this place that is my blog. For making it what it is, for making me feel special, and for letting me share this gift I’ve been blessed with in an honest non-braggy sort of way. I’m glad you’re here.

{{insert warm fuzzies, mushy gushy stuff and hugs here}}

Without further adieu, here’s just about everybody I’ve come to know. If I missed you, you are hereby granted one virtual smack upside the head (for me, not you) and also a free pass to my contact form to write me up a well deserved keyboard lashing.

Kim awarded me this lovely flowery “You Make My Day” award. It’s very springy, so of course I was tickled about that, but even more tickled that Kim just happened across my blog not too long ago. I’m delighted to make her day, since she’s such a chipper chick herself. That’s flattering all by itself. Now I’m supposed to pass this on to 5 people, but I may go over. I’m sure you’ll forgive me, right?

I’m giving this one to: D, Mert, Robin, Caren, Friglet, Geekwif, Angel, Ladybug, Pamibe, SleepingMommy, NappyGirl, and YellowRose.

SleepingMommy awarded me this beautiful Bloggers of the World award that Colin created.

I’m going to pass this on to the bloggers who make me feel more worldly for knowing them. Whether they live in another country or just a different part of this one, at some point I’ve felt like “man, there’s a lot out there that I haven’t experienced” at least once, thanks to these people:

Kailani, MiscMum, Dylan, WhyMommy, Lolo, Susan, Lesley, Kim, Sharon, Sheila, JAM, Audrey, Carmi, Michele and David .

Pam seems to think my blog is Excellent. (The check is in the mail.) Seriously. From a woman who says what she thinks with no apologies for being real. First, I’m going to give this right back to her, second, I’m gonna poke her with a pointy stick for trying to be sneaky about it, and third, I’m going to give this one to some, but not all, of the excellent people I read. Obviously I only hang out with excellent people, since I’m rated “E” for Excellent and we attract those most like ourselves, right?

Here are some excellent people you might not know yet: InterstellarLass, Thumper, Laura, Marisa, Shelly, Heather @ Swordgirl, WhyRUStalkingME, Heather @ Nurseblogger, Crazy MomCat, Mrs. Flinger, Nancy, Kevin and WackyMommy.

Although I find it slightly odd and mildly uncomfortable to be kissed by a girl, it happened and I have to get over it. Robin says “The Mwah! Award is a sweet kiss given to say thank you for friendships and comments in the blogosphere. Apparently it was started by Jenn in Holland.” so with that said, I’m going to have to give a big fat wet one to my long-time friends and top commentors (who actually have blogs).

Virtual kisses to Erikie, Nancy, Kimberle/MommaK, Lisa and Sue.

Tinkerbell forwarded this great compliment and it’s about dang time I pay it forward, too. I have a serious blogroll, folks – and I don’t want anyone to go without knowing that you’re on it, and I read you as often as possible (and sometimes, as often as you slackers update your blogs! haha! ::nudges Raehan::). Some of you might not even know you’re ON my blogroll, so nyah-nyah – now you do.

Jo, Lindsey, The Rock Chick, Darren, DeeJay, Janet, Bitsy, Marshamlow (which, btw, sounds like marshmallow in my head), Christine, June, Melissa, Lulu, Jennifer, Kerflop, Lisa @ Lisa’s Chaos, Forrest, All Adither, Alicia, Emila, MeeAugraphie, Apocalyps, LifeCruiser and Renee.

Did I miss you? Let me know. Feel free to pay it forward yourself – DO let someone know you think they’re awesome, surely it’ll brighten their day as much as you all brighten mine!

This post is from Leanne Wildermuth : Artist by Nature.

A Slew of Awards & Recognition. For You.