I found it!

I saw a commercial the other night and just thought about it, and went to the website. Of course it’s one of those glamorized “weight loss” things, those magic pills, you know.

“Here! Pop a pill and you’ll be SKINNY! I PROMISE!”

Right.

Still, I wanted to see the site, see what was IN the little red pill. Just because I find that so fascinating, that you can buy advertising on TV and convince a Nation of overweight people and/or people who are so self-conscious we’ll try anything except, you know, eat healthy stuff, and do it all without any kind of evidence that your stuff works, without any kind of lab rat trials (only 3 out of 5 rats died! It’s great stuff!), etc. FDA Approval? C’mon. I don’t trust the FDA anyway, they approved Redux and Phentermine and now millions of people have heart problems (including me!), and quite a few people fell over dead from that stuff.

(inhaling another deep breath for my next run-on paragraph.)

ANYHOO. So I go to the site, which is F-Heit.com (opens in a new window). OOoooo that lady on the intro, is that peer pressure? I think so! But, yes, I still want that body. Jeez. I wish. No, not in that way, either. So I click, and there’s the site menu. Cool! Okay now I read that FAQ stuff and see over on the right, there’s some text there that you just can’t miss. It says “Foods that make you look good naked.” YES! I click, immediately. That’s exactly the kind of food I’d like to buy, thank you! Then I read. 13 pages. And whoever wrote it? Is a real person. I’m sure of it. It’s someone I can relate to, too, ’cause there’s some cussing, some run on sentences, and some typo’s. So yeah! I like to read stuff that looks like it was written by a real person, with real thoughts, and opinions, and hey! Some knowledge on the topic!

It was a fun read. Truly. Entertaining, and you know what? I knew all that stuff. I just don’t apply it. There I go with the google search “where to buy a can of stick-to-it-iveness” again, I know.

I could read those 13 pages every day, though.

I’m sure I won’t buy the little red pills. I don’t mess with stuff that messes with my heart rate anymore, ’cause I could just drop over dead. But there are some helpful things on that site, and I think I’ll go hang out there and start writing up my next grocery list. Because really, I’m that sucked in by fancy boxes with tasty treats when I go to the grocery store, and I completely forget that it’s really, really bad for you.

I wonder. If they took out all the stuff that’s bad for you in a grocery store, what would be left on the shelves?

I’d like to see one grocery store do that. Just one. On film even. That’d be interesting to watch!