I think it was an old episode of “Friends” where Phoebe asked Joey to come up with one selfless act. Anyone see that show? I’m stumped on remembering if he ever did figure something out.
This phrase keeps running through my head (name changed to protect the innocent):
Why does it keep running through my head? Because no one calls anyone unless they want something. If people called people when they didn’t want anything, wouldn’t there be an awful lot of dead air after “hello” was spoken? I mean, as soon as you say hello, you’re done. And even hello is selfish, because you dialed because YOU wanted to say it. That’s not selfless. And say you were to ask “how are you today?” You’d do it because YOU wanted to know.
So, the next time someone calls you? They want something. They probably want to know how you’re doing. Maybe they need a favor. But if they didn’t call? Wouldn’t that mean they don’t want anything, not even to know how you’re doing? Wouldn’t that suck way worse than them wanting something?
I think so. I think everyone ought to appreciate the people who want something from them. Just remember, if you didn’t have any impact on that person, they wouldn’t want anything at all. And if no one wanted anything from you, you’d be really lonely.
Let me clarify further – I refer to the more positive “wanters”, not “users”, people who keep in touch really when they just want to use you for stuff. To me, there’s a big difference between a wanter (ie. everyone) and a user. :winking:
While you’re pondering that one, please do throw me your two cents on the whole selfless act hing though, is there such a thing?
{11 Comments}
I understand the philosophical conundrum, but I believe there are things such as selfless acts, yes. Acts of kindness that don’t necessarily make one feel good, thus the payoff… People living selfless lives of either service or contrition, who do it because it’s right, not because of a rush of self righteous emotion.
I can think of a million little things… yes, I think there are selfless acts. JMO, of course. 😀
Of course I want something. I want to connect with that person and say I LOVE YOU! And, if I could meet you over coffee I would hug you too!
LOL!
its to early to be making my brain hurt. stop it. :lazy:
At teh very least calling someone means you want to connect with someone and if you need to connect, picking up the phone is a beautiful thing.
I think there are probabl things that are selfless acts, but you are right, wanting something can be a good thing.
I don’t believe there are any selfless acts because even doing something that causes you frustration might in the end make you feel better for doing something good.
Even when I perform a “selfless” act, I want something. I want that person to feel loved or better. And when it’s an anonymous act, I still wish the person knew that I cared enough to do it. SO I still want something. It’s a struggle. Not letting the right hand know what the left hand is doing can be hard – they are both attached to your brain.
Oooh there are a lot of deep thoughts going on. Thank you for your feedback. I still can’t think of a selfless act, so (Pam?) if you want to go further on that, I’d love to hear your thoughts!
🙂
I want something from you, your friendship!
I do believe that there are selfless acts in the world. There are things I do, not for me, but for others that I do not enjoy, do not get reward for, simply because I know they need it. Sometimes I feel appreciated, most times not, but I keep doing it anyway. Have a most wonderful day. Hugs, clara
I’m actually wondering — is it so bad that there may be no such thing as a selfless act? Selfish is a different story… selfish implies all done for yourself without any care for another. Selfless implies you perform an act “without the self”, in my opinion. How can you do something without your self involved in the process? If helping someone makes you feel good, even if that person doesnt know who you are, it’s still not selfless — you feel good, don’t you?
Anyway, hope that made sense… if not, then… nevermind
:pleasantry:
Good post. I would rather someone contact me for something, be it a question, favour or a shoulder to cry on – as then I’d know that they valued my input.
Deep thoughts – yes we do want something when we call somebody – no matter what – but sometimes it is just to talk with that person – because we miss them and want to catch up. I have just moved across the country and call my friends just to see what’s up!
I do remember that episode of Friends – but I don’t remember if Joey ever figured anything out. I’m thinking probablynot!
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