In a few days, I’m going to turn 36. My countdown always begins on New Years Day, since I’m a January baby and terrible at math, it makes my life easier. (Thanks, mom!)
Chickeymonkey has been on the ball this year with reminders about how many days until my birthday, and she’s been terribly secretive about what she’s gonna get me. I’ve asked. I’ve begged, I’ve pleaded. She’s zipped and I’m left to wonder. Will it be a crayola cake on non-edible paper? Or a purple tulip drawing akin to my monkey card where I doodled and wrote a card for her that said “Roses are red, Violets are blue, You are a MONKEY and (eye) (heart) U!”
So I wonder. The minds of my children are spinning creatively with “what do we get Mommy?” and I love it. I love seeing their eyes sparkle and shine with a twinge of deviousness, keeping a secret from me. There’s nothing better.
Still, part of me wants stuff. I do. I’ll always cave to the kid in me that wants to make a list and give it to my own mommy, you know? This year, it’d go something like this.
I know you can’t afford much this year, and I know you’re probably not going to make the early morning trip to the grocery store followed by a 2 1/2 hour drive to my place just to prepare my Birthday Lasagna, but I want you to know how cool I think that would be, and how a little part of me still hopes you’ll do that – even though it hasn’t happened since my 18th birthday. Thanks for making my birthdays special, even though you’re the one who did all the work.
I know I’m really old now, and birthday presents are a rarity, but here’s the deal. I want some stuff, and I don’t know how to get the stuff. Since you’ve got a few years on me, maybe this year you could just give me tips and tricks, a little motherly wisdom, and I’ll be all set.
- 1. I want the bruised relationships of certain people in my life to be healed. I want to not be the one to have to hold hands and lead people to one another, I want to see people take initiative to make things that are wrong right, and just do it. I want this to happen magically, overnight if possible, so that I can wake up the day after my birthday and hear that bridges have been rebuilt and are better than before.
2. I want Catybug to not put so much pressure on herself to be the A+ kid. She’s turning into a perfectionist, like her mother, and I want her to ease up on herself. I’d love for this to happen overnight, too. I’d like to wake up Monday morning and know that whatever test she has, she’s totally fine with doing her best, and I’d like her to know that I’m totally fine with that, too.
3. I’d like it if I could start getting the words out again. I have so much I want to say, but I care too much about having an opinion that might offend. I’d like to find that balance between caring and being brutally honest.
4. I want my property back. I don’t want garbage leaning up on my big expensive fence, and I don’t want dogs peeing on it, either. Please tell the surveyor to hurry up, and to consider working for a trade.
5. I want to not be so nervous about exhibiting my paintings. I want to humbly hang my work and not think or stress every day that if someone doesn’t like something, that it’s any kind of reflection on me personally.
6. I want my hair to be really long. Please send magic potion.
7. I’d like for my finances to make sense in my head. I’d like to open up the budget and know exactly how to make the impact I need to make in all of the right places, and I’d love for God to continue to provide for us and allow us to continue heading in the right direction.
8. I really would like Lasagna for dinner on my birthday. Really. And german chocolate cake. Chickeymonkey wants to see how many 36 candles are. Just between you and me, I kinda do, too.
So there’s my list, mom. I think it’s affordable, I just don’t think that my 36 years have given me enough time to figure all that stuff out yet, not on my own, anyway. (Okay I can figure out the lasagna and cake, but that’s really much better coming from you.)
Thanks again, mom, for the 9 months and 18 years of dealing with my crazy antics (before I moved out and you didn’t have to take responsibility for them anymore). Thanks for being proud of me even when I feel like I’m failing.
So there you have it, my pre-birthday wish list. There are a few days left, plenty of time to thoughtfully consider it and make some of this stuff happen, right?
I’ll let you know how it turns out.